Self Care Part 1
Learning how to care for one’s self would seem to be something we should all know how to do, especially once we’ve grown up a little. In reality, many of us at times, including myself, really have no clue on what it is we need emotionally, physically, relationally, and/or spiritually in order to refill our cups. Maintaining life’s daily grind, with all of the responsibilities, can overshadow what our own bodies, hearts and minds may be telling us. This week, we are going to discuss some of the dynamics of self care that have helped me along the way, along with some common misconceptions about what self care is really about.
Human beings are inherently needy. We need food & water, rest & sleep & exercise as well as frequent opportunities to give and receive love with other people. Our physical needs, which sometimes can be ignored for a while, usually make themselves known regardless of how intentional we are about thinking about them. On the other hand, our internal emotional, relational, and spiritual needs sometimes can seem quite mysterious and often require intentional time and focus to identify. Even still, identifying our needs is only half of the equation, as now figuring how to best meet these needs is still necessary. It needs to be said that for some of us, starting to consider, identify, and practice meeting one’s own needs can feel quite selfish. Depending on past experiences, some of us may have learned a deep sense of responsibility for others, while unknowingly ignoring our own longings and desires. Fear not, as while it may be uncomfortable at first, the journey to understanding our individual needs unlocks the door to a growing awareness of our own identity and purpose. Moreso, we only grow in our ability to love and help others as our own needs are met.
Another roadblock many people encounter when they decide to delve into self-care is the idea that one should be able to meet all of their own needs alone. The rugged individuality that Americans are famous for, may actually be one of reasons many of us sometimes find ourselves struggling. While self-care, on the surface, may seem to be something I should do alone, hence the term “self-care,” in reality some components require allowing ourselves to be in healthy connection with another. Have you taken the time to consider what it is your heart is trying to tell you as you walk your daily journey? Often, important doors open in our lives simply when we begin to consider what it is I actually want, and therefore might need. Once we give ourselves permission to ask, our hearts and minds love to respond! The next step is finding the courage to engage. We will continue this discussion next week, but I leave you all with these questions: If fear was taken out of the equation, what activities, endeavors, and/or social situations would you pursue? If fear was taken out of the equation, are there some things in your life you would like to remove? The first step is the desire for awareness, meaning taking the time to ask. When was the last time you gave yourself permission to learn how to care for yourself well?
